I will not lie - I have had a rough couple of weeks. I've been unbelievably busy, stressed, upset, exhausted and just about everything in between. As the semester progresses, it has been really hard to find time to make art for myself rather than for school. And the less time I make for myself, the more stressed I become and the more stressed I become the more disappointed and discouraged I become in my work.
Any artist/musician/creator/human-being knows the feeling - pure, unfiltered frustration over hours of hard work gone to waste on something that undeniably looks like crap. Over time, I have definitely become better at accepting these frustrations, perhaps because these fits of artistic disappointment in myself occur so frequently, I have no choice but to accept them. Through practice, it has become a lot easier to see each crumpled paper or discarded sketch as a learning opportunity rather than as a pointless mistake, and I know that no effort goes to waste when it comes to improving my technical skill. That being said, there is no remedy for that tug at the bottom of your stomach when a painting or a picture doesn't come out quite as well as you pictured it in your head.
A related feeling also familiar to artists/musicians/creators/humans is inadequacy. Not being "good enough", whether that is "good enough" for yourself or for someone else, in whatever it is you're trying to be good at is pretty crushing. This used to haunt me a lot in my art-making process. I went to a nice suburban high school with an excellent visual arts program, and I was definitely not the best artist, or the second or the third best (not even top ten if we're being honest), in my graduating class. When I graduated, I wasn't entirely confident in my decision to major in Art Ed., not because I didn't think I'd love it, but because I wasn't sure if I would be good enough. I now go to a university of over 50,000 undergrads, attend classes with extremely talented individuals and live in a city with amazing artists and a thriving art scene. I've never been the best, and its hard to tell if I'm ever even just "good enough", but I could not be more happy and confident with the choices I have made for my future. A lot of practice, patience and professors have helped change my views of how I approach the traps of comparing myself and my art to others, but one thing that has stuck with me was this video I saw about a year ago. (skip to 0:40 for the cool part)
Any artist/musician/creator/human-being knows the feeling - pure, unfiltered frustration over hours of hard work gone to waste on something that undeniably looks like crap. Over time, I have definitely become better at accepting these frustrations, perhaps because these fits of artistic disappointment in myself occur so frequently, I have no choice but to accept them. Through practice, it has become a lot easier to see each crumpled paper or discarded sketch as a learning opportunity rather than as a pointless mistake, and I know that no effort goes to waste when it comes to improving my technical skill. That being said, there is no remedy for that tug at the bottom of your stomach when a painting or a picture doesn't come out quite as well as you pictured it in your head.
A related feeling also familiar to artists/musicians/creators/humans is inadequacy. Not being "good enough", whether that is "good enough" for yourself or for someone else, in whatever it is you're trying to be good at is pretty crushing. This used to haunt me a lot in my art-making process. I went to a nice suburban high school with an excellent visual arts program, and I was definitely not the best artist, or the second or the third best (not even top ten if we're being honest), in my graduating class. When I graduated, I wasn't entirely confident in my decision to major in Art Ed., not because I didn't think I'd love it, but because I wasn't sure if I would be good enough. I now go to a university of over 50,000 undergrads, attend classes with extremely talented individuals and live in a city with amazing artists and a thriving art scene. I've never been the best, and its hard to tell if I'm ever even just "good enough", but I could not be more happy and confident with the choices I have made for my future. A lot of practice, patience and professors have helped change my views of how I approach the traps of comparing myself and my art to others, but one thing that has stuck with me was this video I saw about a year ago. (skip to 0:40 for the cool part)
“Saying that we have enough artists is like saying we have enough scientists, we have enough designers, we have enough politicians — we have enough politicians — but, you know, nobody gets to be you except you. Nobody has your point of view except you. Nobody gets to bring to the world the things that you get to bring to the world — uniquely get to bring to the world — except you. So, saying that there are enough writers out there, enough directors out there, enough people with points of view. Well yeah, there are, but none of them are you. And none of those people is going to make the art that you are going to make. None of them is going to change people and change the world in the way that you could change it. So if you believe somebody that says, “no, no, we’ve got enough of those,” then all it means is that you are giving up your chance to change the world in the way that only you can change it.”
Basically, what this man says in response to a student's question can be summarized in some cliche quote about being yourself or whatever, (I know we all know at least 3 white girls who's senior quote was "Just be yourself! Everyone else is taken!"), but I like the way he says it so much more. Because a lot of people maybe don't readily see the value in a career in the arts, or the value in art itself, it feels like the only way you can validate a career or major like mine is by "being the best". But that is just so wrong and I can't believe that at one point I really felt like I wouldn't be able to succeed or find happiness in my own work unless I was better than those around me. Art isn't in skill; it is in experience and concepts and ideas and stories and everything in between that skill only helps to portray. And no single artist/musician/creator/human-being is going to have the same outlook as another. Sure, there is going to be bad art, and I am going to make a lot of it, but its going to be unique to me and I think that accepting that is just "good enough" for me.
Lately it has been extremely hard for me to feel good enough for just about anything, but I dug up this video and its helped. I'm going to try to keep it in mind the next time I take out the trash filled with crumpled-up sketches or lug a twenty pound wire sculpture mess out to the dumpster.
-trina
Lately it has been extremely hard for me to feel good enough for just about anything, but I dug up this video and its helped. I'm going to try to keep it in mind the next time I take out the trash filled with crumpled-up sketches or lug a twenty pound wire sculpture mess out to the dumpster.
-trina
